The best way to be included in this world...

...is to be given the chance to live as independently as possible. That means giving the child every chance to gain the skills to do as much as he can by himself.

Inclusion is not a place, it is a long-term goal. Sometimes the best way to learn in the long-term is one-on-one, at least for specific things. Learning in a self contained classroom is much more inclusive than sharing a room and learning little.

Inclusive education is making sure each moment is used toward the goal of independence.

Inclusion is not a political statement that my child will be treated like all the others and will be included in the regular classroom. It means that if my child can learn in the classroom WITH ACCOMMODATIONS, she will be in the classroom. But if my child cannot, the most important thing is that she is given the opportunity to learn, to get the skills to be independent.

A child who is at home but totally reliant on others is not nearly as included as a child who is in a self-contained classroom learning skills that will allow him to have a job, care for his personal needs, etc.

The special needs of our children change from year to year. It's important to see them and be open to addressing them.

In any case, I don't see how performing on a spelling test (and not generalizing) is helping your son gain independence.