I think we are here for 2 reasons, to gain knowledge (and by knowledge i dont just mean book smarts, but anything we experience) and love. I, too, often feel like i am "enduring" life rather than living it...and i think its possible it may happen cause we are depending on others for our happiness, rather than finding what makes us happy...depending on others to define our self worth rather than searching within. Letting others who have ulterior motives influence how we feel about ourselves instead of finding that which makes us "worthy".
I think you have had the wrong people in your life for a long time and that these people have not let you find your own self. I think you have tried to please them rather than yourself. If you can try and depend on yourself(i know, easier said than done), love your children and love yourself, the enduring might become living. I hope so. I think you are learning to do this and it just takes time. Your doing a good job tho in my opinion....and in time you will know you are too.
I dont think there are statistics on who on the spectrum have "made it" or not. With everyone being lumped together, from low functioning-sit in the corner stimming to the extremely intelligent "quirky" individual, i dont think anyone knows just how many of each category there are. I could be wrong...
The definition of making it can mean different things to different people. Success is not measured in money or things or jobs. Sometimes success is just making your children happy. Sometimes it might just be making someones day a little bit brighter...Sometimes success is making it thru the day ... sometimes success is simply knowing you are a good person.
You are a good person, a loving mother, an intelligent woman...and i see those things make you a success...i wish for you to see it, too.
cheryl
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