then came the fever

Breaking The Fever

When one was young
fevers were attacked
the grown-ups would rub you
with alcohol
wrap you in wet sheets
refuse you blankets
fan you, feed you aspirin
plunge your wrists in cold water
They knew fever had to be fought
because it let children see
forbidden things

at 103 one would start to hear the voices
soft and lulling
at 104 the faces would appear
swimming around one
with outstretched hands
they would gesture to this one
to come and join them
was always very happy then
floating out on the warm brink
of the world
the fever children
would in high voices
liquid like silver bells
come with us
they would say
come play,
and they would show the one
maple trees turning red and gold
long aisles of sunlight
and woods that glowed and trembled
The body would start to come apart
very gently like milkweed fluff
and one would begin
to rise up toward their
sweet hands
but always at the last moment
the dark heavy circles
of the grown-up’s faces
would force one back down
and their fear would pin the chest
to the mattress
like black crystal paperweights



They would force more aspirin on the one
more ice and alcohol rubs
more wet sheets
and if that didn’t work
they would lift the naked body
and plunge it into a tub of cold water
ignoring the screams
Come back
they would plead
come back
come back
and the fever would buckle
and snap like the spine
of a beautiful snake
crushed under a boot
Then the fever children would abandon the one
and one would be left in a world
of ordinary things:
light bulbs
used kleenex
hissing radiators
thermometers
then one would see the mother’s pale
angry face
and the stuffed teddy
and the precious fever would lie
broken in a thousand bits
with no way to put it back together
and one could never explain
how kind it had been
and how foolish they were to fear it.